Writing in this blog used to be one of my habits and then it wasn’t. I would like to make it a habit again, so I’m thinking a lot about habits. Good habits, bad habits and the habits we don’t even know are habits.
I bought a coffee and a breakfast burrito in the galley of the M/V Wenatchee Thursday morning and waited behind a guy at the napkin dispenser as he took, one by one, 10 napkins.
I’m a three napkin guy. I wondered what he was going to do with all of those. Is he making papier-mâché?
As I took my napkins—swip, swip, swip—it did make me wonder why three? Why three paper towels in the restroom? I know why I do it now. It’s a habit. But how did it become a habit? How did I make it a habit?
I think of habits as actions you no longer decide to do. You once decided to do them and to do them in a certain way, but now as a habit it has a power, an inertia, all its own.
Habits Are Well-Worn Paths In Your Brain
It’s tempting to want to fill your life with new habits, to consciously decide you’re going to wake up and do 50 push-ups each morning. It’s never so easy.
So, what are the key elements of a habit?
- There is little conscious input or control over a habit (which is why they’re hard to start and hard to break)
- They are self-sustaining
- They are swayed by subconscious impulses
When we think of the difference between “good” habits and “bad” habits, we judge them so in relation to our conscious desire. We know, however, that we have very little conscious input on our habits, and that our habits are easily affected by our subconscious selves.
Starting A New Good Habit
Given what I believe about habits, I will have to put a lot of work into overcoming the conscious impotence over this area of my life. That means that if I were to start doing push ups every day (or writing), I’m going to have to make a strong commitment. I’m going to have to keep pushing the bike up the hill until it starts to coast. This will wear that path in my brain and make it easier to do it without deciding to do it. The trick to getting there, though, is deciding to do it every day.
But I’m also going to have to resolve it with my subconscious desire. Why might my conscious desires and subconscious desires be in opposition? If I could figure that out, I would be rich. This will be tricky, but the only thing I can do is develop tools for detecting and resolving when this is the case.
Changing or Ending Bad Habits
I think this, generally, is the more difficult task. Bad habits are triggered by events—eating too much when stressed out, for example.
The first step is to identify the bad habit. What do I do that causes regret? What impulses do I give into?
Once you know the what, you can work on understanding triggers for those habits. When does it happen? When does it not happen? Why does it happen? No, really, why does it happen?